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Showing posts with label nukes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nukes. Show all posts

Thursday, October 13, 2022

Asymetric War (Laissez-)Faire - Crouching Doves, Hidden Hawks

Hard to get some attention in 2022. North Korea's testing frenzy (over 40 missile launches so far) eventually paid off, but with another dictator with a bigger button, an itchy finger, and an actual, ultra violent war raging, KIM Jong-un and the KCNA had to beef up their storytelling.

Look what you've done

So as Putin shot missiles all over Ukraine in retaliation for the incident on his controversial bridge to Crimea, KIM had to mansplain that his recent shots were a simulation of tactical nuclear strikes, and a rehearsal for the wiping out of key infrastructures across South Korea. If no mock up Blue Houses were harmed during the shooting, that was clearly a few notches higher than the usual reactions to joint KOR-US drills, or VIP visits (VP Kamala Harris the other day).

Furthermore, the DPRK demonstrated yet new levels of readiness and stealth, making South Korea's failed test even more embarrassing. YOON Suk-yeol can say the neighbors upstairs have 'nothing to gain from nuclear weapons', calls for nuclear deterrence South of the DMZ keep getting louder.

There's always Uncle Sam's 'ironclad' support, and including on the ground, at a time when Joe Biden can't set foot in Ukraine, or even say what he wants about Taiwan. Besides, hawks are getting a little more subtle across the East Sea, and coordination becomes possible (though whatever LEE Jae-myung may say, the ROK is not heading for a 'pro-Japan defense'). Fumio Kishida and friends even received some help from Kyiv, where Zelenskyy declared that the Kuril Islands belonged to Japan, not Russia...

All eyes should be on a key player: after circumnavigating unusual unrest at home, and Putin's most urgent demands overseas, XI Jinping is about to become more officially ruler for life (at the XXth Congress of the Chinese Communist Party).

(Seoul Village on Facebook - 20221001) "China's 'Panda Diplomacy' in 2022 according to 阿塗 (IG @ah_to_hk). With North Korea supporting Russia's massacres in Ukraine, South Korea (NB Yoon?!?) composing with Xi Jinping Imperator, Japan restoring Imperial Japan, the mighty USA eagle a distant observer, one feather brushing Taiwan... Among countless details, China's Pandamic SNAFUs, its support of autocrat neighbors, South China Sea's floating borders, a few birds that managed to escaped post-democracy Hong Kong, or those powerless doves (EU / OZ / UK / CAN) in the corner..."


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Thursday, March 10, 2022

YSY does it?

Every five year, I have the same dream: that Korea switches to a two-round system for its presidential elections, which would not only reflect more accurately the diversity of opinions, but also result in mergers much more transparent, fair, and based on policies. But no. As usual, we witnessed last minute, winner-takes-all mergers between individuals. And as usual, the dozen-plus roster boiled down to two heavyweights snatching 95% of the cake. 

I wish SIM Sang-jun had raised the issue during her otherwise perfect concession speech. She did claim 800k votes and AHN Cheol-soo at least one third of that even without running (judging by the 300k invalid votes due to last minute withdrawals), but both would have scored much much higher otherwise, forcing main candidates to move closer to the center before the second round.

If none of the polls that followed the YOON-AHN alliance* were made public because they were too close to the elections, they all put the opposition candidate ahead by two to seven points. Yet YOON eventually finished only less than 250k votes ahead of LEE - less than what he gained in Seoul alone:



The capital city confirmed its 2021 rejection of a ruling party that lost not only key strongholds there, but also 4 of the 5 assembly seats in play nationwide on the same election night (by a much wider margin than for the presidential election).

Absolutely not Trumpian on that one, LEE Jae-myung conceded very gracefully. He would have had a difficult time trying to contest the score after the troubling incidents in Seoul, Gyeonggi-do, or Jeju-do that cast serious doubts about electoral integrity. The nation could even have faced a major crisis if LEE had won very narrowly. MOON Jae-in and the controversial head of the National Election Commission NOH Jeong-hee did apologize for the 'incidents', but they involved officials who had to be more than aware of the existential threat their behavior represented for democracy, and they looked disturbingly consistent with the extreme episodes witnessed during the administration's attacks on justice.

Hopefully, this closer than expected final gap was mainly due to the ruling party's last ditch mobilization of its formidable turnout machine combined with a weakened motivation on the other side: AHN guaranteed YOON's win, why vote for such an uninspiring candidate?

By all means, YOON Suk-yeol, a reluctant politician, was not a good candidate. And he was far from always a candidate for good.

I disagree with many elements of the candidate's program, but I want him to deliver the goods on one key front: democracy, justice, the constitution.

Korea needs the YOON who, as a student under the dictatorship, led a trial of CHUN Doo-hwan.

Korea needs the YOON who, in 2013, was suspended for refusing to stop investigating the meddling of LEE Myung-bak's secret services into the 2012 presidential elections.

Korea needs the YOON who joined the team that prosecuted PARK Geun-hye.

Korea needs the YOON MOON Jae-in handpicked as his Eliot Ness to lead the nation prosecutors and justice reform, and who said no when MOON told him to stop investigating Cho Kuk or Cheong Wa Dae corruption.

Korea needs the YOON whom both the extreme left and the extreme right hate. 

And that YOON would better show up. Five years ago**, Korea needed the MOON who stood for democracy, and ended up with another one who undermined it. This divided nation can't afford another betrayal.

YOON's one mission as a candidate was to kick the ruling party out of Cheong Wa Dae, and that will be done when the transition is over. As a president-elect, his mission will be to gather a team that can inspire voters for the upcoming legislative elections, but also reach across the aisle, to moderates among a hostile assembly. 

Very transparent about his lack of experience as a politician, the man has a reputation to delegate a lot, to let pros do their job, and to take full responsibility. YSY does it. So casting will be key.

Candidate YOON needed the People Power Party to run and AHN Cheol-soo to win, President YOON simply can't succeed with the PPP platform. And clearly, there's no way he can unite the nation if he keeps including LEE Jun-seok's anti-feminist agenda. Ideally, that young lad should be the first one to be shown the door, and AHN Cheol-soo should lead the transition team.

I'm not forgetting another essential role of the President: representing and defending the nation in these very troubled times. And Russia's invasion of Ukraine already impacted the campaign and the region:

  • not very good news for a nuclear-free peninsula: another motive for North Korea to keep its weaponry, another motive for South Korea to revive its civil program (MOON Jae-in even had the gall to say the nuclear energy he's been dismantling for years was strategic for the nation's future....)
  • not very good news for Yankees-Go-Home cheerleaders: while LEE Jae-myung struggled with his base, YOON Suk-yeol could herald the alliance full throttle. Joe Biden didn't even wait for concession or acceptance speeches to congratulate his preferred (and fellow gaffe-a-day) candidate.
  • not very good news for XI Jinping's plans to invade Taiwan. And now he knows bullies can be bullied. XI has yet to congratulate a man who made no mystery about where he stands between the US and China.
  • good news for the Korea-Japan dialog: YOON sent clear, positive signals. Let's hope his sense of justice will make him nonetheless stand for the last survivors of Imperial Japan's sexual slavery system, who can't wait for another term.

Tensions are likely to exacerbate in the region because of Putin's war, but much of the ambiguity will be gone, which may paradoxically be helpful for some meaningful diplomacy (including why not with North Korea). Interesting to see how existing and new alliances evolve or take shape.

On all fronts, please, more pragmatism and common sense, less ideology (yes,
that includes you, Milton Friedman).

Please, more transparency, more accountability.

As usual, I'll be keeping a critical eye on the rulers. With cautious hope.


Seoul Village 2022
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* see "AHN Cheol-soo joins YOON Suk-yeol"

** see "A new MOON Jae-in?"  


Monday, July 1, 2019

A small step for CVID, a giant leap for Trump's ego... and North Korea's propaganda

ICYMI, from Kim-Xi to Kim-Trump-Moon, one week without crossing red lines.
=> Watch as a Twitter moment ('DMZero Progress')

'Strategic patience 2.0: Kim Jong-un tells Xi Jinping he'll be patient with Trump..." (20190622 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1142215634140319744)
'Kim Jong-un post-summit blues: "ain't no Sunshine when Xi's gone" (20190622 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1142248145620877317)

'P.S. I love you. Donald' (20190623 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1142641073040195585)

'Will Trump visit the DMZ next week? Will he meet his pen friend Kim Jong-un?' (20190623 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1142703275046686720)

'Exclusive - what Donald Trump wrote to Kim Jong-un' (20190624 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1142965266717896705)
'So we've got the answer to the first question: Trump will visit the DMZ. For the second one (Trump Kim Summit III?): Kim Jong-un's mention of DJT's 'courage' after reading his (RSVP?) letter could be a clue...' (20190624 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1143105424679288832)
'Unsurprisingly, Trump tweeted that he'd like to shake hands with Kim Jong-un at DMZ.... Expect a Moon Jae-in moment when both walk for a second on the North Korea side.' (20190629 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1144750060900458498)
'We should call them #TrumKimHandshakes, not #TrumpKimSummit. #AllFoamNoBeer' (20190629 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1144751209028304902)

'Trump strategy at the DMZ:
1 shake hands with Kim Jong-un
2 say hello
3 chat about the weather and my beautiful tweets
4 step on the other side of the MDL
5 photo ops
6 zero progress, #NorthKorea #winning

#ArtOfTheDealapidation' (20190629 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1144897818596802560)
'Watch out, Jared! Here's Harvanka - @USAmbROK' Ivanka Trump - Harry Harris (20190629 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1144977385483206658)
'Please, don't forget to wash after your courageous VX handshake!' (20190629 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1144903631012954112)
'Trump: Obama was begging to meet Kim Jong-un. In his dreams. Trump Kim Summit' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145185275355648000)
'#MoonJaein qualifies the dismantling of #Yongbyon #nuclear facility as the beginning of 'Irreversible' (#Denuclearization). But it wouldn't add a C or an actual I to #cvid' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145187518565908480)
'To the journos at #CheongWadae: does #Trump's US to Korean translator wear a #MAGA hat? Sure sounds like she does.' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145189650459267072)

'Choppers heading north... Trump Kim Summit' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145194984145952768)
'Shortly after 5~6 choppers left from downtown (above), at least 4 flew from #Yongsan. #MoonJaein joined the #DMZ ahead of #Trump for #TrumpKimSummit' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145198820831055872)
'The spaghetti western moment when #Trump & #KimJongun will walk to the demarcation line...' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145209158855090176)

'Trump realizes how close to the DMZ Seoul is...' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145209680873922562)
'Trump receives a golf gift. Not something to club Kim Jong-un to death with, mercifully.' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145216611495710720)
'Trump abducted' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145222479708745728)

'Kim Jong-un interviewed on the other side' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145222973885837313)
'We'll invite him right now to the White House' - Trump about Kim Jong-un (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145223457237434368)
'#YTN caught the threesome #MoonJaein #KimJongun #DonaldTrump' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145224179630764032)
'#Trump confirmed he'll invite #KimJongun to the #WhiteHouse. With a #MAGA hat or a #Trump2020 cap? Anyway made in #China...' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145224964376674304)
'#KimJongun totally running the show. #Trump's passive body language speaks volumes. No plans beyond shaking hands and inviting KJU to DC.' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145225767074222081)
'OMG. #Javanka in the room with #Trump & #KimJongun!' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145226661035536385)
'I love the smell of VX in the morning' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145226993253801984)
'What a Barnum. Even by #Trump standards. Journos not contained at all, positioned at the last moment, 3 heads of state thrown in the newsfeed frenzy...' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145231380755783681)
'#Trump #WhiteHouse's guestbook: #KimJongun's signature to join among others, #MBS', #alSisi's... Make Amerika Great Again
#ArtOfTheDealapidation' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145233888186269698)
'Well isn't #TuckerCarlson the Secretary of #Trump Defense on Fox?' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145234504170102784)

'Talks restart. #Nuclear proliferation doesn't stop. #KimJongun #winning #ArtOfTheDealapidation #TrumpKimSummit' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145249503072493569)
'And they're back' (20190630 - https://twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/1145252286001643522)

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Saturday, January 19, 2019

Trump-Kim II (from a fly on no wall)

So the second Trump-Kim Summit has just been confirmed*, and as expected (see "Seoul Village Season XIII"), many are afraid of the concessions the POTUS is ready to make.

We just intercepted the phone call that settled the meeting between both leaders:


KIM Jong-un: "I accept to meet you if you accept to condition our denuclearization to US withdrawal from the South".

Donald TRUMP: "Whatever you ask. Could you please VX Mueller and pay for my wall?"


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* Singapore? Danang? Hanoi? End of February? Beginning of March?

Sunday, June 17, 2018

Trump: The Art of the Dealapidation (Exclusive Interview)

Seoul Village: 'Mr President, Welcome to our Korean Errlines'

Donald J. Trump: 'Thanks for having me. I must confess that I was a bit jealous of KIM Jong-un - you already interviewed him three times*'.
 

SV: 'You seem to envy a lot of things from dictators'
 

DJT: 'Look, the whole people of North Korea is forced to love KIM, to attend his inaugurations, to vote for him, to worship him. All the media are compelled to praise him. He doesn't have to worry about laws, human right or justice... I'm great, but I'm not sure I would be able to achieve that before my third term.'
 

SV: 'And he's not even half your age'.
 

DJT: 'Isn't that awesome? This young lad is so talented, he can even ride horses like a stable genius. No wonder we have such a terrific relationship.'



SV: 'We're talking about a cruel dictator, a torturer who murdered even people from his own family.'
 

DJT: 'I know, I'm still a bit weak..., but I'm working on it! And if Robert Mueller manages to have Don Jr flip on me, I won't hesitate to sic my mob friends at both.'
 

SV 'That's the spirit. And speaking of spirits, how could you get so friendly with KIM without boozing along? You don't drink a drop of alcohol'. 

DJT 'We binged on junk food, and you know I don't need to drink to embarrass myself. Plus we were both so high on ourselves... We spent our time boasting about our private resorts, and I showed him my Big Button, the interior of The Beast...'
 

SV 'That's your armored limo.'
 

DJT 'Right. I refurbished it completely with Trump gold, and portraits of the Trump dynasty: me, myself, and I. He didn't show me his set of wheels, but he got his bodyguards run a marathon around it while we chatted. I loved it so much, I asked Jim Mattis to add this stunt to our next military parade.'
 

SV 'So your Singapore Summit was a perfect honeymoon, yet there's a debate about the deal you made.'
 

DJT 'I know, I know, I basically agreed with everything Jong-un asked, I torpedoed our joint drills with South Korea, and to make things worse I said that my threats of last year were just rethoric, so that he doesn't feel any pressure anymore. Anyway as soon as I agreed to meet him, I opened the door to Xi Jinping, who already eased the sanctions, and guaranteed Little Rocket Man he had his back - Oops, I'd better save this nickname for when he turns bad again.'
 

SV 'You are taking a lot of risks. You insisted on playing it on your gut feeling, so if or rather when KIM betrays you, you will own it 100%.'
 

DJT 'Absolutely impossible: the buck never stops here, remember? I already said that if he betrays me, I won't apologize, but find excuses. As usual, I'll blame Obama, Hillary, Comey, the Democrats, the deep state, CNN, Hillary, China, the Swamp, or maybe, for a change, Hillary.'
'Take me to your leader' 20180606 (Dennis Rodman lands in Singapore for the Trump-Kim Summit)

SV 'This deal is not only a textbook case of terrible negotiation, but also very bad for America'.
 

DJT 'First, I've never been good at deals, and actually I didn't write 'The Art of the Deal' myself. Haven't you noticed that everything I do goes morally and financially bankrupt. Me? I only know how to bully people, and when they are women to grab them by the...'
 

SV '... I get your first point. And the second one?'
 

DJT 'Of course I know it's bad for America. Why do you think Putin chose me? Do you really believe I'm putting America First? It's always been all bout me. In order to exist, I need to re-create the World everyday in the image of myself, each time while making big splashes on prime time. What I always do is first criticizing things as the worst that ever existed, then promising deals better than anything that existed before, then destroying everything without proposing a solution, then seeing what happens, and then accusing others it it fails. And behold, it was very good'.
 

SV 'Amen to that. But in the case of North Korea, you're breaking things that are highly radioactive... Should South Korea and Japan worry?'
 

DJT 'I don't care about them, but MOON Jae-in has been on cloud nine ever since he stopped my 'bloody nose' plans, and Shinzo Abe, who like me adores fellow strongmen, is already planning a trip to Pyongyang. Anyway I told you: North Korea is no longer a nuclear threat. Won't happen! Now please give me my Nobel Peace Prize.'
 

SV 'Not so fast. You know this deal can't work.'
 

DJT 'Of course it can't. That's why I asked Mike Pompeo to tell Jong-un to take his time, and just do something nice a few weeks before each of my reelections, starting in 2020.'
 

SV 'How about this year's Midterms?'
 

DJT 'These don't count as elections: I'm not on the ballot'


The Groundsparing Declaration - 20180612


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* see "Exclusive interview with KIM Jong-un - Season III" (March 2018), "EXCLUSIVE-Second interview with KIM Jong-un" (February 2017), "Exclusive interview with KIM Jong-un" (December 2013) - all fake, like this one of course!

---
(from SeoulVillage on Twitter):

Saturday, April 28, 2018

Chirps vs Tweets


'Chirps vs tweets - Inter Korean Summit' (20180428 - twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/990027815734013952)
What a week... a long expected reunion, waves of relief, hope, doubts, cautious euphoria, speeches, informal chats, laughs, tweets, and actual bird chirps.

I'm of course referring to the 2018 Asan Plenum, kicked off by a surreal Trumpian gospel according to Edwin J. Fuller, and wrapped up by a stimulating manel on North Korea. As the theme 'Illiberal International Order' suggests, it's a tad early to wear rose-colored glasses, and a 'red nose' still remains possible (even if Victor CHA joked that he'd 'never heard of it'). When Paul Wolfowitz passes for a dove heralding liberal democracies, you want to be cautious. Once more, kudos to HAHM Chaibong and the Asan Institute, it was great to see familiar and new faces speaking their minds out at such a defining moment.

And what moment. Not that handshake, not that bear hug, not even that Clinton-Yeltsin-ish burst of laughter after a few drinks (see below). But the moment when a North Korean leader left his mob to walk alone across the demarcation line. If we'd been there before, we'd never seen that.

So whom to credit most for this breakthrough? Donald TRUMP certainly served as a catalyst, and XI Jinping as an enabler, but nothing could have happened without MOON Jae-in, and the man who's seen it all, SEO Hoon.

Can we trust DPRK when they say they will give up nukes? Not really - exhibit A Inter Korean Summit I, exhibit B Inter Korean Summit II.

Can DPRK trust us? Not really - exhibit A Gaddafi, exhibit B Iran Deal.

Anyway, as someone uses to say: 'let's see what happens'.
 


ICYMI, Asan Plenum Day 1 in tweets: in tweets
 




ICYMI - - the DMZ strut, KIM Yo-jong's choregraphy, RI Sol-ju's dash, and that other Panmunjom Declaration carved on the trunk of the tree planted by both leaders: 'J hearts J'

CVID?

- 'Complete...'
- 'Verifiable...'
- 'Irreversible...'
- 'Detoxification!'
- 'Sorry, I can't give that one up'
#cvid


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* Michael wondered what was so funny about that $ 100 bill, and the answer is of course that it was old counterfeit money from North Korea, the $ 300 bill with Kim Jong-un's face, and Uncle Jang at the Treasury (twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/990165973658255360

Thursday, March 29, 2018

Exclusive interview with KIM Jong-un - Season III

For the third time*, we've been granted an exclusive interview with KIM Jong-un. If you remember well, the first one followed the medieval execution of Unc' Jang, and the second the putinesque elimination of Bro Jong-nam. This time, I only witnessed North Korea's leader gruesomely murder ten bottles of XI Jinping's Maotai baiju, while we choo-chooed back to Pyongyang in his private train.

Seoul Village: "Hey, that's expensive booze. Don't you want to make them last a bit longer? Or did you get guarantees from XI for a free refill?"

KIM Jong-un: "Don't worry, that's part of the agreement we reached in Beijing: every fortnight, somewhere in the South China Sea, an Eritrean supertanker sailing under Panama flag will transfer its whole shipment to a North Korean fishing boat."

SV: "Wait. You're talking supertanker on one side, and fishing boat on the other... How will that ever fit?"

KJU: "We'll use Russian pipes for the transfer - robust stuff, Made in Rason; I collect 99%, Jinping's family 49%, Vladimir 34%, and the rest naturally trickles down through the usual DPRK black market channels. Of course, Paul Manafort gets his cut, and everybody's happy."

SV: "Sounds legit. You mentioned an agreement with China..."

KJU: "Xi."

SV: "Well that's pretty much the same now. So what's the deal?"

KJU: "Obviously, I had to pledge some sort of allegiance. The trick was to not overdo boot-licking, and to avoid as much ass-kissing as possible - believe me, considering Xi's considerable tummy, that required expert level in circumnavigation."

SV: "I see. I also see that you're circumnavigating my question as well."

KJU: "Don't test me. Remember that when I test something, even mountains can collapse... Well Xi treated me like a kid, but I got a few candies in return - our restaurants in China can operate again, for example. And if the US ever try to strike North Korea, China will step in. So when (if) I meet The Donald in May, sanctions won't bite as much as they do now, and there will be a third 800-pound gorilla in the room. When you think that just weeks ago I was totally cornered, and about to get bombed** right after Pyeongchang... now I'm safe until at least May, and under the protection of The Godfather himself..." 

Ri Sol-ju (in beige), Kim Jong-un (in Mao neck jacket), XI Jinping (in red tie-carpet-vases), Peng Liyuan (in cowhide)

SV: "I presume Xi was not happy to learn that you could meet Trump before himself."

KJU: "Now that one got me flummoxed in the first place. I never imagined that Don would accept that quickly. But then again, our meeting may never happen."

SV: "But you did confirm Xi you were committed to denuclearization, right?"

KJU: "Yup, with the usual caveat: I've always been willing to denuclearize once all the conditions are there: first the US-ROK drills stop, then the US withdraw completely from the peninsula and from Japan (I'll throw the Philippines and Guam in for good measure), then Korea reunites under my rule, and only then I give up all my nukes."

SV: "For good?"

KJU: "Sure, forever. Just like the States and Russia when they pledged to do so."

SV: "So if I get it right, you keep your job, your regime, your nukes. But you return under Beijing's wing, and you have to resist the urge to test new toys for a while."

KJU: "Bah. Anyway, testing nukes in Punggye-ri or what's left of it was getting each time trickier. Xi suggested me to ask some of my customers to test my products for me in their own most deserted wastelands."

SV: "I get the picture. And I bet Bashar has paved the way for many new potential sites. With this new diplomatic frenzy of yours, we may all start from a blank slate."

KJU: "Peace, at last."

SV: "I almost forgot. You'll meet MOON Jae-in pretty soon..."

KJU: "Who?"

SV: "MOON, the South Korean president." 

KJU: "Ah, that guy. Well I have to, haven't I? After all he's done to get me out of this mess. I guess I'll have to find him a job for after the Unification. Not the management of Moranbong, anyway - I already promised that one to the dude who was supposed to succeed him."

SV: "AHN Hee-jung? He's heading for jail, now - Mr Nice Guy turned out to be Weinstein on steroids."

KJU: "Precisely the kind of people I can trust. I also have a job in mind for John Bolton when this is all over."

SV: "Uh... Bolton's American. And not exactly a fan of yours."

KJU: "He's my next Chief of Staff. I need to recruit radical warmongers just like him. Also, people who thrive in corrupt environments, experienced ones like PARK Geun-hye or LEE Myung-bak. Zuck is already helping me source new talents."

SV: "Mark Zuckerberg?!?"

KJU: "Our JV, Kimchi Analytica, has been screening social networks for years. How do you think we selected you for our interviews? And as an expert in Weapons of Mass Disinformation, would you like to head our KCNA?"


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.
* see "EXCLUSIVE-Second interview with KIM Jong-un", "Exclusive interview with KIM Jong-un" - Agence Fausse Presse.
** see "Alert!"